the past few days have held a couple conversations and events that have really solidified this realization in my mind - the begining of summer will be the end of an era for our family, dare i say... my favorite of my life so far.
We will add a third kid to the miller lineup - which is a giant adjustment in itself,
Ryan will NOT be a student - a change we have been counting down and excited for, but at the same time will be a hard lifestyle to let go of,
Ryan will begin the demanding schedule of an orthopedic surgery resident - and if you don't know him like I do you may not realize how seriously he takes this - he is so excited to start focussing completely on the specialty that he has chosen and to learn the skills he needs to become the best surgeon he can become and truth be told, it's just a time consuming process.
Bel is officially signed up for preschool - for me this is a big deal, because she is my first child and this is the first time one of my kids will be away from me for a significant amount of time, plus she'll be in the influence and instruction of someone else and while I trust the her preschool is a safe place, that her teachers are good people and the kids who she'll be with probably won't be awful - it's just the begining of the end...
...the end of my favorite era of life. The simple, stay-at-home, student years during which I have always had one arm and one leg for each child, the time when we have had no schedule except the one we want to create for ourselves, the time when they have loved and relied on mom and dad alone, the years that Ryan had a summer vacation, that sweet window of time when my minature comrades giggle and play and talk together more than they cry and whine and fight, when all my kids agree that mom and dad are the strongest and the smartest and the best, the years that they are our world and we are theirs.
I will miss the ability to pick up my life and transplant it somewhere else for 3 months, I will miss being so needed and adored by my children, I will miss being there for every moment of my kids' lives, I will miss the simplicity of it all and ok, ok, I will miss all the control and power I have over what enters my children's bodies and minds and I will miss them.
Please don't misunderstand this, I am looking forward to so many things about the future - near and far - but I also know what a good thing I have right now and I am hesitant for it to change.
So I just had to take a minute to write down that I noticed this moment of my life, that I love it, I appreciate it, and I will miss it when it trickles away into a different era.
6 years ago
6 comments:
christine! i am so excited for you to have a third!! do you know what you're having? bel and jack are soo cute. you have a beautiful family!! xoxo
Ditto girlfriend. I'm so glad you shared that because I am feeling every bit of that same emotion. Change is hard and it's so hard to let go of such a wonderful time of life but such a blessing and ability to be able to be excited about the future and take it on with a great attitude and faith that it will be wonderful. Good luck!!
Well said. I was just thinking of how we are going to be entering a different stage of adulthood now that school is coming to a close.
I admire how you focus on the good in the present moment. Are you staying in Ohio for residency? Congrats to Ryan getting a spot!
Oh Frederick/Christine how I love thee! Thank you as always, for the words, I never worry that we will run out of things to say and yet...it is so good to say them, and hear them, and read them. I have so many times that I treasure and I think the fact that they are fleeting gives them value. And I know that you know that...the best is yet to be.
Oh Christine, as usual your words are so beautifully written I want to cry. I don't think I've ever known anyone who can express sadness,joy,wonder and excitement all in the same sentence-and it makes perfect sense. While I wish you were moving back here, I am glad you're not moving even further away! Miss you all and I'm counting days 'til graduation!
I know what you mean about letting go. At times I can't wait for Owen and Gabe to be old enough to go to preschool so I can have a break but at the same time I won't be the one who is deciding what they do... It's hard to let go.
Congrats on the third child to come! You may not have enough arms and legs for tree, but if you have had two, adding a third is not too hard. You are a pro by now :)
Post a Comment