mish mash and a little mush

(just found this draft from a couple months ago - i think i'll keep it for the record)
my phone is often lying around just waiting to become prey to my children.  tonight i was going through my camera roll and found about 20 self portraits of bel, 15 of jack and a 1min 22sec video by sage.  it was pretty awesome.  i often wonder what it would be like to watch our home life from the outside and watching, mostly listening, to that video was a tiny glimpse - it was amazing how much it caught - sage's independent babbling, me nicely nagging and answering questions (two things i do a lot of), bel talking about jewelry and jack being melodramatic when he didn't get his way.  i know i am far more entertained by my children than anyone else, but that is just part of my job description.  so tonight, a little mish mash glimpse into what's been going on lately.


just a couple thoughts...

today as i was pushing all three kids on the swings, i couldn't help but smile - they were all giggling, smiling, happy, completely in their comfort zone - at home, with mom and dad, barefoot in the sunshine.  I spend so much time with my kids in their comfort zone that i often forget the way they act when they are outside of it - i am repeatedly surprised by their behavior around people they don't know well, or places they've never been, my brave, talkative children latch on to me for dear life, not wanting to respond verbally or even acknowledge they've been spoken to.  I can't count how many people have told me what a serious baby Sage is - Serious Sage, one friend of mine calls her.  but at home, she practically smiles on command, she giggles, she babbles, she plays along with our games, she follows us around, never wanting to be still and rarely wanting to be alone.  She is not so serious to us.

Then there is Jack, the boy who never stops talking - he is full of stories and questions and explanations - he talks to me and ryan and bel and sage and strangers (as long as i'm close and he's in the right mood), he lectures me and bel, he screams when he's upset, he even talks when he is exhausted (the trick to get him to sleep is to make him stop moving and stop talking at the same time for a full minute and then he'll be out in a jiffy).  he is a creative self entertainer, who loves to play with water, build things, sneak treats and be in cozy places.

And of course my Bel, I forget how reserved she can be because she is one of my favorite people to talk to in the whole wide world.  She always has been - (pardon my extra details for a moment) - we moved away from our comfort zone, Cache Valley, 3 months after she was born.  I stopped working in an actively social office, hanging out with friends, frequent visits to family, ryan was working long days - there we were - lone companions.  she was often the only person i had to talk to for a long time, months.  And so i did, i talked to her and lucky for me, she learned quickly and she talked back to me.  even with all the words we've exchanged, i can't quite think of the right ones to describe how happy it made me to talk with her from such a young age, and it still does.  she is artistic and detail oriented, a thinker and determined learner, thoughtful and loving, sensitive and sweet.  so (back to the original strain here) when she doesn't talk to others, i am so surprised and a little sad for them, that my ever so articulate daughter is hesitant to speak.  I suppose that is one of the best parts of being a parent (or a spouse or a sibling or a true friend) - you get to know who a person really is, when their guard is down and their personality and thoughts flow from them freely and you get to drink it in - their true genuine self.  it makes me feel so lucky. i am so lucky, so blessed.

at the very top of my list of favorite things about my life right now is story time.  i get very impatient during bedtime prep because it's at the end of the day and my nerves are usually wearing thin and i don't want it to cut into our story time.  because during story time me and bel and jack all cuddle in close and read together.  there is no whining, no arguing, no nagging and for a glorious 20-40 minutes we all just enjoy a good story (and some kinda boring ones, a few stupid ones, a bunch that ryan says, "i could've written that one").  it does so much good for my soul to end the day on that note - it's something that i look forward to every. single. day.